September 3rd, 2019 -September 6th
Your hero took off the training wheels and waved bye bye to his party of heroes. His first day on the road he had set out with two goals: get a haircut, and get a SIM card. Both objectives turned out to be flops. In particular, the SIM card caused concern as our hero wandered the streets aimlessly searching for an ATM which proved much harder to find than anticipated, nearly causing him to miss the bus to get to the airport for his flight to Amsterdam, The Netherlands. The crisis was averted, though, and your hero was on to country number two.
Introducing the stars of our show
On your left you’ll see Paul. Right hand man to your hero, Paul is tall, classy, large-heighted, and big hearted. Your hero needs no introduction but we wouldn’t dream of denying you a Dutch photoshoot. To the fans back home: Eat your heart out.
After a whole episode that need not be retold, your hero and Paul finally found a hostel to stay in. A bit pricy, but with good reviews (apparently Amsterdam hostels are super dusty according to hostelworld). Paul had only one request: we stay away from the red light district. He was in luck, because our hostel was only RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF IT. This proved to be less of a problem than initially thought, however. Less carnal and in your face than advertised, Paul and Scott were able to enjoy leisurely strolls by the water without much compromise to Paul’s conscience.
Evening 1 consisted of an evening stroll to explore, Paul’s first stroopwafel, a pizza dinner, and a couple drinks by the canal before turning in for an early night.
Day 9 on the road, Day 2 in Amsterdam
Day 2 started off about as mundane as it gets: your hero set off on a solo mission to do laundry. He donned simply shorts and a t-shirt, not expecting the drop in temperature he was about to endure. After dropping off laundry and learning it was cash only, our jet setter wandered the streets for WAY too long in search of an ATM that wouldn’t scam him. Once again his lack of SIM card really took its toll, and the weather took a turn for the worst as it did its best “Noah’s Ark” impression. Our hero finally found an ATM by the train station that was INSIDE (a critical component) and ignored the exorbitant fee as he hit submit.
He wasted more money as an excuse to get out of the storm as he walked into a bar and was immediately told “pay or get out. No sitting, no toilet, unless you’re a customer.” The bartender drove a hard bargain, but since his swimsuit was in the wash and he was battling hypothermia he had no choice. He got his revenge though by inadvertently dripping all over the bar. Seeing the determination in his eyes, the bartender softened and offered him a washcloth to dry off.
Scott made a beeline back to the laundry shop, retrieved his clothes, and sprinted back to the hostel to meet up with Paul and change into dry clothes and PANTS.
The weather cleared up, and Scott and Paul enjoyed a Dutch pancake dinner before walking around the Jordaan, largely considered one of the most beautiful neighborhoods in Amsterdam. They walked along the canal in awe of the pristine, serene beauty that met their gaze. The water twinkled as the sun looked down on it, ushering in a new scene to replace the vengeful storm from earlier.
The Fault in Our Stars
One of my guilty pleasure favorite books is “The Fault in Our Stars.” I am very tough and stuff, but I sobbed like a baby. Both times I read it. I could not make it through the movie.
As such, it has long been on my bucket list to drink champagne along a canal in Amsterdam like the leads do in the book. The Jordaan was so striking, and I knew this was my moment. Eminem said you only get one shot, and I was not about to blow this one.
After the champagne canal scene was over, your hero and his companion “found” (they were told about it and still took ages ambling along trying to find the secret entrance, only finding it after another couple managed to locate the doorbell and merely following their lead) an incredible speakeasy where they encountered an older British couple who recommended they checkout the cities of Bruges and Ghent if they travel to Belgium. In addition to the incredible atmosphere and being wowed by one of the most talented bartenders they had ever seen, they were given a new heading. Belgium was already next on the list, and now they had two more cities to check out in addition to Brussels.
After concluding their time exploring, Paul and Scott got carry out pizza and sat on a canal with their feet dangling above the water. They made up stories of what the ducks below, flocking underneath them in hopes of a dropped crumb, were thinking. It was a peaceful and fun end to a disjointed, hectic-yet-mundane, and beautiful day.
Day 3
For their last full day in the city, Scott and Paul had to make it count. Please refer back up to a quotation by dear Marshall Bruce Mathers III for more information. Your heroes rented bikes and took a ferry outside of the city for a route recommended by your hero’s older brother who used to live in the Netherlands. They had gotten off to a late start, and in order to get as far as they wanted to on their bike route and make it back in time for their tour of the Anne Frank House, it was essential that they make haste. So naturally they stopped for an hour long snack and tea at a cafe as soon as they got off the ferry to start their ride.
And back to our regularly scheduled programming
Once their pitstop was complete, they were ready to properly start. In what would be a trend during their time in Amsterdam, your hero did not dress properly and spent much of the bike ride shivering. This did not, however, stop him from craving ice cream the entire time they biked. The Dutch countryside was beyond beautiful, and your hero loved every second of taking in the luscious green fields. Once they had got their fill in (Re: realized it would take a miracle to get to the Anne Frank House in time for their tour) they turned around and headed back.
Miraculously they made it to the Anne Frank House in time. The tour was powerful, and it was worth the pretty penny that it cost. Afterward, your dynamic duo returned to the Jordaan and biked around the neighborhood to find more hidden gems and see more of the now familiar but ever beautiful streets. After spending time riding around the canals, they took to a park that Paul had seen on his map app. They found a beautiful multi-level restaurant inside the park and had no choice but to stop for a beer.
Your merry men continued their bike ride around the neighborhood and through the park. The Netherlands doesn’t mess around with their canal bridges, and many of them would make gardens in Michigan feel inadequate.
Your hero returned to the hostel early, where he made friends with a couple of people at the hostel bar. When Paul returned, the four of them took a walk before stopping at another bar for one last drink and hitting up a pastry shop on the way back. Their time in the Netherlands was drawing to a close, and Belgium was on the horizon.
For your Quarantine Pleasure
As I sit in my basement for day ??? of quarantine, slowly losing my sanity, I search for things to keep myself entertained in a safe way. I realize that, to be honest with you, my time in Amsterdam measured by activity was, apart from a couple exceptions, not too different from what is considered safe during this pandemic. When you think of Amsterdam, one of the most popular cities in Europe, there is probably a number of big time things that come to mind. While I did engage in some of those, I also engaged in a lot of quieter moments and menial catch ups. Apart from a couple trips to the bar and a visit to a cafe (not a euphemism), a coffee shop (a euphemism), and the Anne Frank House, I kept it pretty quarantine-friendly: strolls with a friend (six feet apart of course), coffee, take out pizza and stroopwafels, bike riding, doing laundry, and getting trapped in the rain while lost due to aforementioned SIM card debacle (Re: negligence to buy) while searching for an ATM. While the sights on my bike ride and walk were a little bit (to say the least) more exciting than what I can find in suburbia, Michigan, the big difference is my attitude. In Amsterdam, I was excited that I had an opportunity to slow down and catch up on life a little bit. I relished my walks with Paul and enjoyed a quiet drink in contrast to the high octane partying in Ireland. I sought out parks and quiet neighborhoods and tread down familiar streets multiple times just to relive their beauty.
To this point, I’ve been bemoaning my time at home during quarantine. I’ve been citing boredom every chance I get. Yet as I write about my time in Amsterdam, I reflect that not only was this a beautiful three days of my trip, it was a three days that I could easily capture the spirit of even during social distancing in southeast Michigan. I can go for social distance walks, I can go biking or long boarding, and I can enjoy a quiet drink. Not to mention Facetime and zoom calls! For those of us in safe households who’s main issue is boredom or lack of stimulation, perhaps we are missing the quiet and hidden adventures that can be found even during these frightening times. Maybe I just need to say to myself, “‘dam bro, chill.”